WEEK 9 – TAKING IT TO THE 9s SEVENTEEN SYLLABLE STYLE

It was the kick heard round the east side and the internets. My phone feeds were flying as I working a concert and I knew something real big had happened at game of the week. I am sure we have all had those dreams. Those dreams of kicking it over your nemesis’s head to win the game, or dreams of making a diving catch and stopping the other team from scoring with bases loaded. The actual chance that such awesomeness would happen to anyone, especially during game of the week is about as rare as triple double in basketball. Congratulations to Dan Magua and Murda Inc for living the dream and embodying the excellence of victory. Dan you da man, a most humble man at that, thank you for making week eight truly great.

Of course major props also to Kunt Punts for being gracious non-winners that night. Major high fives to Scott Stewart and Nick Lerner for their scheduling mastery this season. Six games were decided by one run, two games by just two runs. Easy math tells me that half the games were decided by less than two runs. Picking winners these next two weeks might be decided just as easily if I were to flip a coin (then again that wouldn’t be any fun now would it.) Since I missed every singe game last week due to my job, let’s have some fun and talk about the sixteen match ups for week nine haiku style (see mom and dad I AM using my creative writing degree)

 

LOVE GARDEN SQUIDS AT WILDMAN ATTACK FORCE – LYONS WEST – 5PM –

love garden
got new attitude
brings them a number one seed
these folks are nasty

wildman attack force
americas team
wanting to relive the dream
never forget ‘12

 

BASIL RIDE AT SCREAMERS – LYONS WEST – 7PM –

basil ride
will they take the fives
center field torn M C L
hey they got wiggins

screamers
thanks for the nachos
your team is improving lots
this ones for bobo

 

SPACE PUSSY AT TACO TUESDAY – LYONS EAST – 5PM –

 space pussy
we love your spirit
but you are still 0 and 8
break that streak this week

 taco tuesday
we all love tacos
chelsey is bad ass pitcher
this week you win two

BULLET PROOF TIGERS AT HARPER VALLEY PTA – LYONS EAST – 7pm

 bullet proof tigers
cougar is the Man
spewin stats whenev he can
self deprication

 harper valley PTA
moms and dads play here
feed us vagina cookies
future of kickball

 

HAPPY SHIRT AT TERRA BONNE PO BOYS – HOLCOM RIGHT 5pm

happy shirt
always in the final
brianne winningest lady
chris ford old man style

terra bonne po boys
last years champions
nick devin only wears tanks
brad rides crotch rocket

 

WHERES MY PITCHES AT MERCHANTS OF DEATH – HOLCOM RIGHT 7PM

wheres my pitches
ritchie vaughn old school
currently one and seven
channel the tupac

merchants of death
two buck beers sunday
jairo took ball to the nuts
keepers of di plate

 

DAS BOOT AT LOS MATADORES – HOLCOM LEFT 5PM

 das boot
this is for das brad
we miss you molly and chris
terminator best

los matadores
kenny heath sammich
paul santos has puppet hands
why you hurt ‘gain shane?

 

JAZZHAUS AT CHALMERSIZ – HOLCOM LEFT – 7pm

jazzhaus
chris h a bad ass
good job you are in pool four
pass me the fireball

chalmersiz
lovers of fifteen
why does soobs where old man pants?
rachna one fit babe

 

BAD NEWS BAGESL AT CHANNEL 6 – HOLCOM RED 5PM

 

bad news bagels
emma freedom tent
your outfield is totes bad ass
most improved team yaah!

channel 6
recruit king JP
world record for LFK
you can do it mike!!!!

 

HOTEL LOBBY AT RATS – HOLCOM RED – 7PM

 

hotel lobby
bring that intense
thanks Addison for go pro
make us look so good

RATS
top four line up stacked
first basemen has huge hands
CJ says it so

 

FREE STATE CROWLERS AT MURDA INC – HOLCOM GOLD 5PM

free state
because without beer
kickball just isn’t as good
leslie and her braids

 murda Inc
dan dan dan dan dan
face first slide home plate winning
jollys balls just dropped

 

GOATS AT UPTOELEVEN LATE FEERS – HOLCOME GOLD – 7PM

goats
meh mehhh meh mehhh meh
lauren thirty scott commish
shaher base run fast

up to eleven
mick cottin captain
of most fun and base run
robyn say ready

 

ASTEROIDHEAD AT KUNT PUNTS – HOLCOM BLUE – 5PM

 asteroidhead
fueled by kambucha
mascot a dog named yuba
clint thrasher bad ass

kunt punts
umlaut or not guys?
you most gracious at losing
thanks for beer specials

 

RED LYON AT HURTS DONUT D-HOLES – HOLCOM BLUE 7PM

red lyon
tech savvy realtor
you guys on fire last sunday
bring it shawna gurl

hurtz donut d-holes
arie loves spread sheet
bickel rest in center field
stick it in their hole

 

BREWBALLERS AT GHOSTS – HOBBS PARK – 7PM

 

brewballers
can you win your first
kristina we think you can
sam as bald as son

ghosts
mike pergande king!
katie dry erase board queen
will they bring plate home

 

ROCKETS AT SACRED SWORD – GAME OF THE WEEK – HOBBS 9PM

 

This game deserves a little more love than seventeen syllables. Not only is this my roommies team versus the team I played with for six years. These are teams and players who have over the past decade brought the ruckus to game of the week. You put james findley, kyle schneweis and Andy Frye under the lights and let their talent and ego-ful athleticism soar. You give josh Hunt, Mary Costello and Pat Fielder a stage and they are going to sell it out and make it legendary. In addition we believe this to be the first ever game of the week where a husband and wife compete against each other. Will Dave Owens bunt one in front of Amber and see if she can chase him down? Will Amber boot one over Her hubby’s head just coz she can? At 9pm let the games begin. I am still hoping for a race around the bases in rocket costumes, dragon suits and ren-fest chain mail.

 

rockets
red phallus on shirt
andy frye nice pony tail
riley motor boat

 sacred sword
joel kelly bunt king
win for t-bone and katie
age is state of mind